So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize