He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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