made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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