OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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