I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
