He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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