i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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