Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
