if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
