Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
