My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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