All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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