Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize