Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize