farters have to be the big spoon...
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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