D3 body, D1 cock
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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