FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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