The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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