the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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