i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
