friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
