Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
So. Much. Porn.
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