i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
