New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
you would pick up someone in the library
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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