no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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