He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
