All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
