we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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