What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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