Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
