OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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