When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
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