His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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