Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
