fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
How many fucks given?
0.12846
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
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