Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Blood and glitter go together right?
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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