If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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