I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
