my being single is dangerous.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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