I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
A+ Viking dick
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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