Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Randomize
