do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
