I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You're like the curious george of whores
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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