everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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