In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Come see our sink grown plant.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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