Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
