i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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