"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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