Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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