I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
